Shia lunges at you, but you're prepared to take him on. You axe kick him to the ground, smashing his head against a rock. A human would have died from this, but Shia is no man. Blood gets in his eyes, activating his war vision.\n\nThe fight rages on for what seems like an eternety. With each blow sticken, you both begin to tire. The toll is heavy, mass amounts of damage has been dealt. You both prepare for one final strike. Shia bares his nails, while you... ([[Aim for the jugular!]] [or] [[Aim for the chest!]]
You jam the rock into LaBoeuf's head, dazing and confusing him. You shove the superstar off your body and pull yourself off the ground. You see the treeline in the distance, perhaps it's where you came from? Shia staggers, but he's clearly starting to snap out of it. Should you... [[Try to escape]] or should you [[Get ready to throw the f*** down]]?
(DISCLAIMER: This interactive adventure was inspired by Rob Cantor's song "Shia LaBoeuf". This creation does not reflect the opinions of Mr. Cantor. It is not officially related to the song and should not be considered as such.)\n\nThat being said, let's go to the [[Beginning]]
You're sure it's nothing. Possibly a badger, or the common Sasquatch. Suddenly, something tackles you from behind! You fall and hit your head on an inconveniently placed rock. \n\nYour vision is blurred, but you can make out the splotchy figure of your assailant. You pick up the rock and strike him in the... ([[Head]]/[[Crotch]]\n
Out of the corner of your eyes, you spot him; Shia LaBeouf. He's following you, about thirty feet back, he gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint. He's gaining on you, you'd better... ( [[Try to escape]] / [[Get ready to throw the f*** down]]
Your cautiousness pays off, as you narrowly avoid a bear trap two feet in front of you. You slink to the cottage and peer inside to find Shia LaBoeuf brandishing an axe by the fireplace.\n\nHe's so engrossed in his work that he fails to notice you on his doorstep. You creep inside the lodge and proceed to... [[Kick him into the fire]]/[[Throttle him (2)]]
You strangle Shia from behind, wrestling the axe from his hands in the process.\n\nYou jab the axe directly into his kidney, and he falls to the floor, lifeless. You walk out of the cabin, scraped up and injured, but otherwise alive. \n\nBUT WAIT, HE'S NOT DEAD! Shia pulls a gun while clutching his axe. Fortunately, you know Jiu-Jitsu and proceed to body slam him. You grab the axe and chop his head clean off.\n\nHis head, expressionless, rolls to the floor. You walk away from the cabin, never looking back. You have defeated Shia LaBoeuf\n\n(Want to try again? Go back to the [[Beginning]])
You strangle Shia from behind, wrestling the axe from his hands in the process. He fights with vim and vigour, but your fighting for your life on two fronts now, and that sends you the rush of adrenaline you need.\n\nYou jab the axe directly into his kidney, and he falls to the floor, lifeless. You begin to grow dizzy and fall down from blood loss, you can't survive in this state, but you can go in peace knowing that you have beaten....\n\nShia LaBoeuf.\n\n(Want to try again? Go back to the [[Beginning]])
You kick out of his seat, he drops the axe and tumbles into the flames. \n\nYou would think you're safe, but no. After spending so many years on the Transformers movies, Shia has grown a resistance to fire and all forms of incindeary attacks.\n\nYou pick up the axe and start swinging at Fire LaBoeuf, trying your hardest to avoid his blows. You get burned, but manage to cleave his head off with one fell swoop.\n\nHis head drops to the floor, his burning body setting the cabin on fire. \n\nYou walk away from the burning cabin, its flames warming up your back. You head back into the forest to look for your car. \n\nThis story's gonna absolutely KILL back at the lodge, you can tell the boys how you have beaten...\n\nShia LaBoeuf.\n\n(Want to try again? Go back to the[[Beginning]]\n
You roundhouse that son of a bitch right in the throat, tearing his neck clean off. His head goes flying as blood spurts from the stump where his throat used to be. \n\nYou can't celebrate, though. You feel a sharp pain in your lower body. Your grip your side, only to feel blood and some of your ribcage. That son of a bitch got you good. You're losing blood fast, and you're nowhere near your car.\n\nThis is the end, but do not lament too much, for you have saved countless others from a far worse fate. \n\nAs the life drains from your eyes, you lay down and breathe deeply. You have won, you have beaten...\n\nShia LaBoeuf.\n\n(Want to try again? Go back to the [[Beginning]]
With all your remaining strength, you catch Shia by surprise and throw him into the fire. He screams in agony as blood oozes from your stump leg. \n\nHis screaming stops, Shia has died. \n\nYou limp over to the fire and cauterize the wound. Though the toll was heavy, you've won. \n\nYou have beaten Shia LaBoeuf.\n\n(Would you like to try again? Go back to the [[Beginning]])
Your hand punches straight through the actor's chest, tearing out his heart. LaBoeuf's face turns into a shocked impression. You pull your arm out of his torso and hold his still-beating heart.\n\nLaBoeuf falls to the ground, dead. You bask in your victory, staring at your prize in the light of the moon. You shove the heart in your pocket and try to find your car.\n\nYou have won, you have beaten Shia LaBoeuf\n\n(Would you like to try again? Go back to the [[Beginning]])\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
You slam the stone right into the groin of your unknown assailant. Too little do you realize that it's Hollywood superstar; Shia LaBoeuf. Prolonged exposure to Michael Bay has removed all feelings to his nether reigons.\n\nLaBoeuf smiles visciously and licks his teeth. He sinks his freshly whitened incisors into your jugular. He tears meat out of your neck, ripping its stringy fibers apart with his oscar-worthy grin. \n\nYou lay lifeless on the ground, blood oozing from your broken neck. You've lost, you were killed by Shia LaBoeuf.\n\n[[Beginning]]\n
Benjamin Nutt (Inspired by "Shia LaBoeuf" by Rob Cantor)
Your hastiness comes back to bite you, as does a bear trap. The metal clamps down on your leg, tearing through it like wet newspaper. Seeing no other option, you gnaw of your leg to break free. \n\nThe pain is madenning, but you manage to limp up to the cottage. You see Shia LaBeouf inside, sharpening an axe by the fireplace. He's so absorbed in his work that he doesn't notice you.\n\nYou sneak up behind him and...[[Throttle him]]/[[Throw him into the fire]]
Actual Twine-able Shia LaBeouf
You're looking for your car, but you're all turned around. He's almost upon you now, and you can see there's blood on your face. My god, there's blood EVERYWHERE! You run from LaBeouf with reckless abandon, knowing full well of what will happen if he finds you. \n\nYou've lost him, but you're hopelessly lost yourself. You creep silently through the forest. In the distance, you see a light eminating from a small cottage Every instinct inside you is telling you to run towards it, but your mind tells you cautiously inspect it. What should you do? Should you [[Run towards it]], or [[Cautiously inspect it]]?\n\n
You're walking in the woods, there's no one around and your phone is dead. You hear a noise behind you. Do you [[look into the corner of your eye]], or do you [[keep going]]?\n\n\n\n