You are dog. You're enjoying a night off with your best friend, swiss cheese. "How will we save me from cancer?" asks swiss cheese, your best friend.
[["You've gotta go pro on the Civ V circuit."]]
[["You gotta make fungus meth."]]
[[Eat swiss cheese.]]
Life on the Civ V circuit is ruff. Swiss cheese is a huge tryhard.
[[Eat swiss cheese.]]
(set: $cash to 0)\
Your mistake! It should've been shrooms, not meth.
[[You keep making meth.]]
[[You start making shrooms.]]
[[Eat swiss cheese.]]
Delicious.
[[Restart->Home]]
(set: $cash to $cash + 20)\
Wow, you have so much money! You have $cash money. Do you want to reinvest in a mutual fund?
A new friend shows up at the operation, driving a wedge between you and swiss cheese. She's sharp cheddar, and swiss cheese feels like he doesn't have an edge. Suddenly, he comes to you with an ultimatum: "We've gotta eat her."
[[Resolve this diplomatically.]]
[[Eat sharp cheddar.]]
[[Eat swiss cheese.]]
[["You'll get along. You're not a Muester."->resolved]]
[["We're going to Disbrieland!!!!!!!!!!"->resolved]]
[[Eat swiss cheese.]]
Man, I'm glad we never went down this path.
You hug it out, but then you cut the cheese.
The camera zooms out. You all start laughing and keep laughing as the camera zooms out, because it's like a sitcom! Freeze frame.
[[Eat swiss cheese.]]